Sweet Maple, Santa Monica
I went down the healthy route with the egg soufflé like thing, steamed in a skillet
I wanted to eat somewhere different for breakfast this morning, and within a short walking distance was Sweet Maple. I was warmly greeted at the door, but that soon changed when I decided to play musical chairs. “Can I sit at the larger table? I need some space for my laptop.” “Oh no, we can’t—sorry, we have large groups coming in already.” I can tell you, nobody came to sit at those tables, so that already peed me off. I didn’t go as far as asking, “What time are they coming?” There was no point. They sat me behind the front door, so when everyone came in, a huge draft passed behind me, wafting into my back. No, that’s not working. So, I got up and pointed to the opposite side of the room: “Can I sit there instead?” (I could tell the host was becoming annoyed now.) “Oh, but that is not part of the restaurant at the moment—nobody is sat there.” That was the whole point: I wanted a quiet space to type.
As I walked over, another voice appeared out of nowhere: “The toilet is that way.” “I am not looking for the toilet!” I announced. After much faff, I eventually sat where I wanted to. But my God, there was no need to put me through such an ordeal.
I looked at the menu before coming and wasn’t sure about it, and that didn’t change in person either. Everything seemed heavy and not that interesting to me, but I went down the healthy route with the egg soufflé like thing, steamed in a skillet. Bacon and “chicken mango” sausage were chopped and placed on top. It was nothing special—and yes, I burned my tongue on it (it was hot). I found it dry as I spooned some of it onto my toast. “Do you have a sauce that goes with this? It is quite dry,” I declared. I confused the waiter, as it took a whole three minutes for them to realise, I wanted the bacon jam that was on the menu. I noticed there was ketchup on the table too, so I squirted some of this onto the egg to try and resuscitate it and bring some life to it.
Fried potatoes were on the side (nothing remarkable about those), and overall, this was a very average breakfast. When the bill came, you have the option to leave a tip—you almost feel obliged to leave one because your server is stood there hovering over you! How can you get away with not leaving one?? That’s right, make us feel guilty about it—your tactic works. This was my one and only shot at Sweet Maple. It was nice knowing you for an hour. Bye.
La Reine Gourmande is a professionally trained chef, former dancer, and lifelong food obsessive with a deep passion for haute cuisine and global gastronomy. She has dined her way through the world’s top restaurants while honing her culinary skills at L’École Ferrandi in Paris and the Ashburton Cookery School in the UK. Blending her love for food and fashion, she offers a unique perspective on what to eat — and what to wear — on your next culinary adventure.
